So, I have a friend who asked me, I mean, a friend of theirs, to ejaculate on their face. I, I mean, their friend did so. It got in my friend's eyes and burned really bad, and now she's pissed and not speaking to me, I mean, they aren't speaking to their friend. So, is this on me, I mean, their friend? Or is it on my friend for not closing their eyes and requesting it in the first place? I don't know what her fucking problem is! I warned her that semen can burn if it gets in eyes and that she should keep them closed, and she agreed to, but in the moment, eyes wide open. she was all "it turns me on when I see it flying at my face." No, this isn't my fault! I mean, they and their friend. Also this never happened and I've never ejaculated ever, let alone on someone's face.
Your little friend's fucked. Wait, that's not right -- your little friend's not fucked. You might want to see a doctor about that.
I have a Long Weekend coming up... sadly, my dentist's already laid claim to fuck my mouth back into shape. That... came out wrong. Also, Rose City Comicon's that weekend.
Sorry, I can't help you. I'm not jizzing on any faces anymore, not after what happened last time. That was a a different thing than what this thread is about. I wasn't involved this time, that was my friend and their friend. Actually, it wasn't a friend. I don't even know these people, it was just a story I read on r/AmItheAsshole. I can't even do it anyway because I don't have genitals of any kind. I'm like a Ken doll down there. That seems fair. I'll see if she'll go for it. I mean, I'll suggest it to the people on Reddit who did this because I definitely wasn't involved. That might actually work. I mean, it wouldn't neutralize anything because ammonia and semen are both alkaline, but it would probably rinse everything out and, while many would consider getting urine in their eyes gross, it's unlikely to cause any real damage or discomfort.
Whenever a lady tells me "cum on my face", I always tell her "Okie dokie! Might want to close your eyes, though."
You can jizz on my face! Funny I will be on your side of the state that weekend but I will be visiting family then and staying away from any jizz opportunities.
