Brothers charged with stealing US bridge NEW CASTLE, Pennsylvania (AP) — Two brothers have been charged with stealing a western Pennsylvania bridge and selling the 15 1/2 tons of scrap metal for more than $5,000. Police say 24-year-old Benjamin Arthur Jones and 25-year-old Alexander Williams Jones of New Castle used a blowtorch to break up the bridge in late September or early October. They face felony charges of criminal mischief, theft, receiving stolen property and conspiracy. Authorities say Alexander Jones told a recycling company employee that he had permission to carve the bridge for scrap and showed the employee cellphone photos of the bridge. The recycling company called police. The 50-foot (15-meter)-long by 20-foot (6-meter)-wide Covert's Crossing Bridge was in a wooded area about 60 miles (100 kilometers) north of Pittsburgh. The brothers' phone numbers weren't listed, and it's unclear whether they have attorneys.
FINALLY I think I found a buyer for that Brooklyn Bridge I've been trying to unload for years. All the New Yorkers are very skeptical of my claim to ownership.
Yes, I was being a humorless bastard. I understand what 14th Doctor meant. I was channeling my inner El Chup.
What dumbasses, how the hell did they think they'd get away with something this stupid? See, shitheads like this are the ones who make it difficult to sell scrap without intervention by the state. They've passed a law here where you have to wait ten days for your payment from the scrapyard and it's a check at that. All that does is burden the dealers with more shit to do and brings the prices that much lower. Had a trio of thieves that were actually stealing the brass flower holders from graves and selling them. Of course they got caught but it just goes to show how stupid crack heads and alchoholics can be after being addled for years. These three were gringos, two men and a woman who looked as if meth was a breakfast cereal additive like sugar. They had that look and looked that bad. Oh, hope these fuckers with the bridge do some serious time.
Point of order: He said "theft of this sort would impress a liberal." He didn't say "only a liberal would be impressed by a theft of this sort."
You know, I saw the thread title and thought: Did they steal that bridge to the future that Obama built? In secret. Out of invisible steel. Hey, I'm loaded, I think it's funny. When you feel the comedy, Everyone is material.
Ancillary point of order: I didn't say that I was impressed by the theft--just by the scrotal fortitude of the crooks to even attempt something like that!