Apparently, Kristi also executed three horses. This 63-year-old farmer has some questions about that.
I feel like I should point out that, if you can afford to fly to Texas for your stupid teeth, you can afford to find a no-kill shelter for your fucking dog. Bitch probably thought Old Yeller was a comedy.
Even if Cricket was an out-of-control dog who did in fact need to be put down, there are more humane ways of doing so than taking her to a gravel pit and shooting her in the head.
"Further questions about the passage should be referred to the author" seems like it's probably as close to "fuck you" as a publisher ever gets.
Any mailcarriers around should watch this report carefully and avoid rural mail routes in the dakotas.
Is she a better choice than guy with a rotten brain, guy with a malformed brain going rotten, and guy with a worm in his rotting brain?