Someone's Life is Now Complete

You know that they'd been itching to write this kind of headline for a while.

yes, someone was itching...jock itch perhaps?

Still the best headline ever (from a local paper back in the late 80s/early 90s):

JOGGER BEATS OFF NAKED ATTACKER

Yeah, that beats HEADLESS BODY FOUND IN TOPLESS BAR.

I like the unintentionally funny headlines like

Something Went Wrong Before Plane Crash, Investigators Say

sort of like "that didn't end well" - if things were going well, then they wouldn't have ended!

"MEL GIBSON CHASES JANE FONDA IN NUCLEAR-POWERED WAR BUS"

This is, believe it or not, from the same newspaper that ran "Students get first hand job experience" last year.

For those who haven't spent time in that particular world, one of the fallback cliches for headline writers is to dig through the story for a quote and pull it out as a headline rather than use a boring old "So-and-So wins Miss Teen Kansas Whatever." In this case, the girl was talking about some challenge and said "This week taught me that this is definitely doable."

The quote headline works about 10% of the time, is either lame or nonsensical about 89% of the time ... and this is the other 1%.

There is a saying among copy editors: You need a dirty mind to run a clean newspaper.

Well, at least it's not fake news.

https://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/7xzo7q/so_i_live_near_a_town_named_hooker_and_another/

I have a picture I took of a pub in London called "Knobs And Knockers." Obviously some kind of reference to doors or something but really? Come on now.

I have no idea what else you could be referring to.

Anyhow, I’m off down The Old Cock.

What about a skydiving attempt?

Don't sell yourself short EC.

Is that near Cockfosters?

And here's another example of the other 1%.

I believe we have a new winner.

HA! Now who's laughing at my love of MILF porn?

Al of us

IS RUDY GIULIANI A LEAKER? TRUMP'S LAWYER FINGERED BY JAMES COMEY

A gem from the Daily Fail.

Hysterical bitchfest at the link.

Assault with a bodily fluid?

That is fucking hilarious. If I saw that happen, I'd point at the woman who wasn't breast feeding and say "Ha-Ha!", like Nelson Muntz.

@Elwood and @Ancalagon agree!